Relationship Breaking up advice

You have probably heard about implementing No Contact soon after a break up and there are many articles and discussions about it all over the internet. It is one of those strategies that are extremely important but not many are keen to implement. It’s not easy to completely shut yourself off from the person you love. It’s a habit and a drug.

I think the first thing you’ll likely do is to rationalize why No Contact is not for you or why it’s not as important as others say. Let’s look at why No Contact is important and if it’s really beneficial for your situation.
What is No Contact?

In my opinion No Contact = No Contract.

Your relationship started with a contract that bound the two of you together in a mutual agreement to love, cherish, respect one another. When you enter a relationship you do so because of the benefits you’ll receive from the other person. Everyone wants to be loved, to be looked after, to be respected and to have their opinions count. That’s why people get into relationships.

What happens when your partner tells you they don’t want to be with you is a major slap in the face to you and all the effort you have put into the relationship. They’re pretty much saying the contract is up, their lease is over and they’re ready to move out and move on to bigger and greener pastures.

It hurts because your ex has ditched you when you still felt you were under contract for another few years or even indefinitely.

Now in reality you wouldn’t go crying and begging to the bank if they have rejected you or if a business rejects you. That’s not professional and their respect for you will pretty much go through the floor. Same thing will happen with your ex, though they will be a lot more sympathetic and they might even make you feel better through compensation. However this is never long lasting and often another break up will happen around the corner.

Now clearly things are never quite this simple in the real world. Depending on why your relationship ended, going straight into No Contact can be a negative instead of a position. What that means is sometimes you need to use your common sense and decide what you should do for your situation.

If your ex has left you it might be a lack of one or more of the following:

appreciation
affection
desire
passion
acknowledgement
excitement
newness
respect
willingness to share and contribute
growth and expansion

Whatever their reason may be, you need to accept that you might never really know the real reason they’re leaving you. (Often they won’t really know either)
What To Do After Getting Dumped?

I don’t recommend going into No Contact straight away if you still love your ex and want your ex back. Why? Because if you still love your ex and you want to make things right, it doesn’t make sense to not try to get them back. But that’s not really the problem. I would think most people reading this would have tried already to convince their ex to come back; it’s the most natural thing to do especially directly after a break up and when you’re highly emotional.

Now if you were dumped the day before and it was a big shout fest where lots of unpleasant things were said and you woke up this morning feeling like crap and regretting the whole thing. I recommend settling yourself down so you’re not in a state of panic before calling. If your ex refuses to talk to you, whatever you do, DON’T keep calling!

Wait a few more days to try. You should never go on a txt message binge or anything of the kind. Now if you have ALREADY done that, then you should start No Contact right now.
The Truth Behind No Contact

A lot of people think once they have started no contact, that means if they talk or even acknowledge their ex at all from this point on, it means they have failed the entire process. Please don’t be harsh on yourself, if you set a bunch of rules that are unrealistic in nature (eg, like not talking to your ex if you work together) you are only setting yourself up to fail. Be flexible but understand your main intentions for going into No Contact.

Here are the main rules to follow:

Don’t try to do anything purely to provoke a reaction out of your ex.
Don’t initiate conversations that could lead to a ‘friendly’ relationship with your ex.
Don’t call your ex to talk about anything other than when there’s a major emergency.

Another easy way to remember how to act is to think of your ex as a distant acquaintance you have neutral feelings for. You wouldn’t call or go out of your way to talk to someone you barely know and that’s how you should treat your ex during the No Contact phrase.
How Long Should No Contact Last?

If you’re going to use this rule to the extreme (not always recommended)

You typically use No Contact until one of two things happen:

a) your ex hints at wanting you back or

b) you don’t want your ex back anymore.

It’s not difficult in theory but people aren’t robots and we often misread signs or get too excited too quickly. Now the important thing to remember is if you do happen to make a mistake and it sets you further back, don’t panic! It’s not the end of the world and mistakes will undoubtedly happen! Simply go back into No Contact and continue on knowing you have learnt a lesson from your mistake.

Now what will happen is that your ex will contact you and suggest to get together (or you might even suggest to get together). Go out and have some fun but in the back of your mind you should be thinking where this ‘date’ should be leading. If it’s not progressing towards reconciliation then you go back on No Contact and be honest with your ex about it.

Simple in theory but hard to implement in the real world (like most things).
Surviving No Contact

I won’t lie, it’s hard like a druggie trying to come clean. But it WILL get easier. The more you distance yourself and the less you communicate, the faster the healing will be. Clearly if you go complete cold turkey, you’ll make faster progress than someone who sees their ex everyday and has to make small talk out of politeness. If you want to get through it quick, consider taking a long holiday somewhere.

What I mean by getting through it quick is getting to the point where it isn’t so painful going through the day without talking to your ex anymore. You want to get to that stage where a few days might go by without having thought of your ex at all. That’s the best position to be in because to survive the break up, you need patience and you can’t get it if you’re staring at the problem every second of the day.

Want a secret formula to surviving no contact? Or how about how to STOP no contact all together?

How to Get a Woman to Treat You the Way You Deserve

How to Get a Woman to Treat You the Way You Deserve
By John Alexander
Author, How to Become an Alpha Male

You know the scenario. You start dating a woman. After the first date, all you get is a peck on the cheek.

Second date, you get a mouth kiss. Third date, you hold hands. It's a very slow process.

You can't understand why it has to take so long to have sex with the woman. After all, you're buying her meals. You even splurged on some pretty flowers.

In short... you're being incredibly nice to the woman. So what's the problem? Why won't she have sex with you?

It comes down to human motivation. People behave in ways that cause them to get rewarded. They avoid behaviors that cause them punishment.

So the reason why guys often have trouble getting laid is because they reward bad behavior. A chick will lead them on and then make it clear there won't be sex that night, yet the guy rewards her by cuddling with her.



A better solution would be to punish the bad behavior by being a lot less interested in cuddling with her. Never underestimate the power of getting up from the couch and walking out the door.

Remember, to harvest the full enjoyment out of life and to have women be attracted to you, you need to be an alpha male. That means being powerful. So make sure you get treated the way you deserve to be.

Did a chick do something (like have sex with you) that deserves rewarding? Then go ahead and do something nice for her. Take her on a date to a fancy restaurant. Buy her filet mignon and Don Perignon (if you've got the money).

Does a chick just string you along, telling you nice things that she would do for you if only she didn't have a boyfriend? Then withdraw your attention, and go talk to other girls instead of her.

Frame all of your behavior towards women in terms of punishment and reward, and you'll be treated the way you deserve (or else you'll move onto another woman who WILL treat you right).

John Alexander is author of How to Become an Alpha Male... a seduction success guide for men. Learn more advanced tips on how to develop the mind set of an alpha male to find the success with women that you desire.

What Men Desperately Want You To Know (But Will Never Tell You)

What Men Desperately Want You To Know (But Will Never Tell You)

The first conversation can make or break the future of the potential relationship.

The first conversation can make or break the future of the potential relationship. In other words, the goal of the “first” conversation should be to make it stimulating enough for the other person to want a “second” conversation – and this doesn’t happen by gathering “statistics” about the person.
What it means: Many women who find themselves on the search for “the one” strike up casual conversations with potential suitors and only ask “interview style” questions.
“What do you do?”
“How long have you worked there?”
“Where are you from?”
“What brings you here?”
While these types of questions are okay to ask, they fail to make the conversation stimulating and memorable for both parties.
The key to getting a guy to want that “second” conversation with you is digging deeper! No, this doesn’t mean that you have to carry your gardening trowel in purse when you go out. “Digging deeper” simply means that you need to use the first conversation to ask about his passions and interests. Believe me, you’ll get a far better picture of a man by asking about his interests, as opposed to his job history!

If you want the “first” conversation to result in a “second” conversation, make the first one memorable by digging deeper and finding out more about the guy than what’s listed on his resume.

More information please click HERE

i want to get married this year

If men are not approaching you, there might be something that's making you “unapproachable”. Men are always approaching women, but there are certain situations that will stop them in their tracks: a group of women, a woman who is sitting down, a “mean” facial expression, etc. Are you preventing men from approaching you?

Men work in mysterious ways and the thing that they strive to protect most in life is their “ego”. Yes, no man likes a shattered ego. Because of this, men typically approach women that look “safe” – rather than going up to someone that is likely to embarrass or reject them.
For example, most men refrain from approaching a woman that is surrounded by a group of friends. Going up to a group of women is intimidating and requires the man to impress all the ladies, rather than just one. This drives the odds of actually striking up a conversation with the lady he has his eye on through the floor.

Bottom Line: If you want men to approach you more frequently, learn how men view certain situations and position yourself in a more approachable manner.

For more information please
CLICK HERE

Top 10 Ways to Fail to Get Your Ex Back

Why does some relationships fail despite how hard one couple might try?

You might be aware why your relationship didn’t pan out so well; it might be an argument, an affair, a misunderstanding or a lack of trust and appreciation.

You might be worried you’ll make more mistakes so you might not take action at all.

Here are the Top 10 things that might be stopping you from get your ex back.
10. Are you taking it seriously?

If you want your lover back, you need to be committed. You need a plan you can follow seriously. If you doubt yourself, if you think you can win them back by doing what you’ve always done, you might not see the results you want.
9. Not willing to change.

If you’re completely honest with yourself, are you willing to do change to get your ex back? Are you willing to risk and sacrifice anything for them?
8. Inner conflicts.

Perhaps the reason for the collapse of the relationship is rooted deep within yourself. If you are having emotional issues with yourself, such as dependancy or insecurity, then maybe your energy should be redirected to fixing and mending your self-love first.
7. Not paying attention or understanding what they want.

Redirect your attention away from how much pain you are feeling right now. Instead consider it from your ex-lover’s point of view. Have you hurt them just as much? How can you help them?
6. Are you taking action?

Simply saying you’ll change and things will be better does not equal being so. To show your ex you really are going to change, you need to start putting that change into action. Showing your ex how committed you are means more to them than any words you could say.
5. Are you confident?

People are attracted to those that are strong and confident. For men, if your girlfriend has left you don’t simply shower them with attention, gifts and whatever else (unless that was the reason you broke up). Identity the root of the problem and go from there. If you apologize blindly without dealing with the core issues, your ex will see through your blatant persuasions and won’t fall for it.
4. Panic.

Panicing at this stage will only do you a great deal of unnecessary damage. This means drunk dialing, smsing one after another, stalking, talking to their friends/family to try to get them to talk to you. ALL TO BE AVOIDED.
3. Misbeliefs about gaining their trust and love back.

You can never EXPECT them to come back. Thinking that way will be evident in your actions and this will only repell them. Be genuine and loving to them but never expect to get the same in return.
2. Too proud.

You need to realize what is most important. Winning the battle or winning back love and rebuilding a meaningful relationship. Swallow your pride and don’t let a good thing go just because of your ego.
1. Self-abuse.

It is much too common for people to drown in their sollows with alcohol, drugs or anything of that nature. This is NOT the time to start being self-destructive. You need to be in the BEST shape you can be right now. Meaning eating healthy, exercising, getting out of the house. Substance abuse is not only bad for your body, it will make you feel WORSE not better in the longrun.

Want the complete proven system to get your ex back? Even if you’ve made all the mistakes and feel your situation is hopeless.



The Ex Recovery System - Get Your Ex Back in 30 Days or Less

7 Ways to Make Your Ex Fall in Love With You

You might not realize it but you have major advantage over anyone else when it comes to making your ex fall back in love with you. Think about it, you had their heart once and that love for you never dies if it was true. No matter how long it has been, how often you talk, you’ll always have a place in their hearts whether they admit it or not.

But you want to know how to re-ignite those flames and have them burn with passion again.

So here it is: 7 ways to making your ex fall back in love with you.
Become free

If you’re in love with your ex and this is something your ex is aware of, it’s harder to make your ex fall in love because they know you’ll always be there waiting. People only want something they can’t have so by making yourself available to them they will not be as inclined to ‘want’ you in that way.
Make yourself scarce

Don’t allow yourself to be readily available to your ex. You have your own life that is separate from them now. Don’t wait around hoping your ex will contact you. Go out and do things that you enjoy. You’ll be amazed how fast things will start to happen once you’re not ‘waiting’ around for it.
Take care of yourself

Get yourself to feel good again. Do whatever that works for you to get you energized and pumped to face the day everyday. This could be going for a run in the morning, getting a new hair cut, learning some yoga or going camping. It’s amazing but when we feel down, the quickest way to cheer ourselves up is by moving around. So get those juices flowing. When you’re pumped and enjoying life, you pull people towards you.
Become grateful

It’s completely amazing what will happen and how you’ll feel once you are grateful for everything in your life. It’s weird but by simply feeling grateful, everyone around you sense that you ‘have’ something they don’t have. Like I said, people are desperate for things they don’t have. When you appear to HAVE everything, everyone will want what YOU have! It’s weird. You’ll glow inside and out and your ex will be driving themselves crazy thinking about what has changed!
Let go of the past

We tend to want to dwell on past issues. You’ll especially be driving yourself crazy thinking about what went wrong with your relationship and how you want things to be different. I want you to know in order to make your ex fall in love, you need let go of those negative feelings and thoughts. Not only will you make them want you, you’ll feel a huge weight lifted from you and that will show through when they see you.
Embracing change

Let’s admit it, no one is perfect, but what is worse is if we accepted that was the way things were and never welcomed and allowed change. Thing is, change is the only sure thing in the world. If we’re going to change, why not embrace it and try to change for the better. When we set goals for ourselves and take steps to achieve our goals, we’re not only building our self-confidence but you’re letting your ex know that you’re working on your flaws. Action speaks ten fold compared to words, and its actions that will make your ex fall crazy in love with you.
Lastly and most importantly, give love to yourself first

We have all heard the saying ‘you need to love yourself first before you can ever love anyone else’. Once you gain that unconditional love for yourself, you’ll no longer rely on others to validate your sense of worth.

For example if your ex made a comment that might potentially hurt you, you won’t allow it to bother you anymore because no one else’s opinion can mean more to you than your own.

When love is readily available inside you, you won’t seek to others for that love. When you stop needing love from your ex, it is then when your ex will give their love to you.

Want to know the SPECIFIC steps to getting your lover back?

I’m virtually handing over all my best kept secrets and revealing one of the most powerful and extensive systems available on the planet…

The Ex Recovery System - Get Your Ex Back in 30 Days or Less

How To Save A Dying Relationship

We all want our romantic relationships to last. As much as possible, we hope to make it as smooth sailing as possible. Nonetheless, such ideal situation never really exists. There will come a time when disagreement between couples will surface. Problems and confrontations will arise, and soon after, what seemed to be inseparable and indestructible begins to crumble and shatter into pieces. You then wonder how you can save your dying relationship.

Of course, if you were in this case, you’d want to save the dying relationship. You’d do anything in your power to bring back the pieces together. We cannot afford to lose someone we hold so dear to our heart that’s why we struggle to find ways to patch things up.

In most cases, the early stages of a relationship determine if a couple is meant to last. It is where you get to know your partner better and that is the time when you decide if you can accept everything that your partner is. This is the time when you try to adjust yourself toward your partner and you also work on compromising some of your own ideals and preferences for the sake of attuning your lifestyle, and probably your mindset, parallel to your partner.

At times, conflicts may arise and you may at times feel that things aren’t working out the way they’re supposed to. Then you start getting frustrated, and slowly, your ties begin to loosen up, beginning to separate the bonds that once were so strong.

It is a sad ending if such happens. Sometimes, pride gets in the way. Because of anger and frustration, you end up losing the relationship.

The thing is, because of too much pride and anger you forget to realize the worth of your partner. You tend to disregard everything that you’ve been through. More often than not, you realize these things but a little late than necessary. This will bring you much pain than you’ve ever felt which will make you think what you could have done instead.

There’s a lot you can do to save your relationship. However, no matter what plan of action you choose, the success of saving the relationship wells from both of your conscious effort to make things work.

Both of you must want to patch things up. You must take time to understand the situation, accept the things you’ve done wrong, and start with a determined stance of making things better for the sake of love. At times, your partner may want to have some space and time to mull things over and that is perfectly okay.

Communication is key; everything works out when there is communication. Let your partner know what you want and don’t want, and what you’re willing to compromise. Make your partner feel that you want the relationship to last and that you are willing to give anything just to make it work.

Coming into terms to save a dying relationship may be complex for some but it is relatively easy. This stems from your sincerity and genuine desire to be with the one you love. If you have that in your heart, then nothing can be a problem.

Just break up?

Want to know what DEADLY mistakes you could be making right now that’s driving your partner away?

The Ex Recovery System - Get Your Ex Back in 30 Days or Less

What Most People Don’t Know About Getting An Ex Back – Here’s 3 Simple Re-Attraction Steps That Will Get Your Ex Chasing After You!

In this video I reveal 3 things that most people are NOT doing when they want their ex back.. the steps to winning your ex back is actually fairly basic (revealed in this video and part 2 of this video). These are things most people don’t know about OR don’t know how to do correctly! It’s all here so pay attention!

To Watch Part 2 of This Video Click Here

Click Here For More Information!

(Take Quiz First To Get a Personal Evaluation Of Your Situation)
1st Thing You Need to Know to Get Your Ex Back

Going through any break up will be difficult so I want to make it as easy for you as possible.

First of all, you need to know that what you may have done so far to get your ex back is simply NOT effective.

This is because you’re likely to be driven by EMOTIONAL wants and desires.

When you’re emotional, you tend to exhibit a weakness that is simply not attractive to an ex partner.

Therefore if you’re a man and you’ve reverted to beta-like characteristic, this may be keeping your woman away from you.

And if you’re a woman, begging and pleading your man to come back will not be exactly attractive and appealing either.
2nd Thing You Need to Know to Get Your Ex Back

Remove your ex partner’s resistance from you and the break up first, before attempting to try any sneaky attraction tactics to get him or her back.

Removing their resistance is about using No Contact or Limited Contact CORRECTLY! A lot of people struggle with this because they don’t understand how to do it effectively!

The question I get asked the most are:

“If I don’t contact my ex, how will they know I still care?”
“I feel No Contact would be hopeless as it seems they don’t care about me anymore. What if it doesn’t work?”
“How do I contact my ex after a break up? How can I get my ex to talk to me again?”
“I feel I’ve made too many mistakes already. Is it too late?”
“How do I know I still have a chance with my ex?”
“What if my ex is seeing someone else?”

I want to help you with all of these questions, through my blog (please have a look around and learn all you can) and through my free newsletter here. I also highly recommend you check out my complete guide to winning your ex back, The Ex Recovery System.
3rd Thing You Need to Know to Get Your Ex Back

Re-attracting your ex partner is not exactly the same as attracting someone new. If you want to get your ex’s interest, you need to show him or her that you have being making some progress and have CHANGED since the break up.

This can be ANY change, as long as it’s not something you usually do. This will get an ex’s interest. Eg. if you’re usually a stay-at-home person, now is the time to go out and get active and social. And if you’re usually a social person, who parties a lot, instead of going out every weekend, why not take up a new hobby and devote some energy into that for a change.

Re-attraction is a huge topic on its own, here’s some places for you to get started!

Women – Click Here on How To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back.
Men – Click Here on How to Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back

Once again, if you haven’t taken a look yet, please check out my video and part 2 of my video here:

To Watch Part 2 of This Video Click Here

Click Here For More Information!

(Take Quiz First To Get a Personal Evaluation Of Your Situation)

First Steps to Getting Your Ex Back

by Ashley Kay

Getting your ex back doesn’t need to be complicated, but people do tend to make a few wrong moves because they’re reacting upon emotions rather than using logic and sense. Here are some quick and easy steps for you to follow that will point you in the right direction:


Step 1:

One of the biggest mistakes people make is thinking they can simply talk their ex into coming back. This usually ends with you becoming emotional as your ex remains cold and distant. You do not want your ex to see you in this state. They will pull themselves further away because not only do they know you are doing it only to benefit yourself, you’re causing a scene and making them feel uncomfortable at the same time.

Instead act against your feelings and allow them the space they need. Be calm and co-operative.


Step 2:

During a period of no contact, you need to get yourself active and moving. The more you stay in one place obsessing about the relationship, the more likely you will want to contact your ex. You need to get out and about. Start exercising, do things that make you feel good, hang out with friends etc. Think about it like: you don’t have control over what your ex wants to do, but you do have control over your own experiences. So decide whether you want to stay home and be sad all day or go out and enjoy the time you have instead. Either way the outcome will be the same.


Step 3:

Gradually get back into contact with your ex. Let them know you still care about them and you’re thankful for the great memories you have shared. Tell them you would like to catch up sometime as friends. Appear upbeat and happy. Although you might be wondering how this will bring them back. Just think about how the relationship started in the first place. They didn’t fall in love with you because you begged them to go on a date with you. You need to let them slowly open up to you again.

Step 4:

When things are slowly going well, you can try asking them out on a date. Nothing serious though. If the thought of a ‘date’ scares them, simply don’t call it a date; rather just two people hanging out. This way they can rationalize it to themselves that it is not a date.

Want a complete proven system to getting your ex back? Join the hundreds and thousands of happy customers today!

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Online dating for women is unfair.

Online dating for women is unfair. Statistics show that 90% of the women participating in online dating sites are all emailing the same 10% of the men on those sites. As you can see, the competition is fierce for women in the world of online dating and that’s all the reason that you need to learn the best practices of online dating.
What It Means: Click Here!
Many women dive into online dating out of desperation to find “Mr. Right.” This “dive” is usually taken without any preparation or knowledge regarding the online dating scene. There are particular things that a woman must do to be competitive on online dating sites. In other words, if you don’t prepare yourself in way that will beat the “competition” – you may never get an email or response from all the “Mr. Right”s you find online!
Bottom Line: Take the time to learn the “do’s and don’ts” of online dating before you hit the scene to prevent it from becoming a discouraging waste of time.

For more please click here

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How To Ruin a First Date

It’s amazing how often I see women make mistakes that can kill a date before it even gets started. You are out to have a good time and you want to be yourself, but there is some information you just want to save for later on.

I have been on hundreds of first dates and there are a few things that a woman can do to kill my attraction for her instantly. It’s true that men are visual, but having nice looks just gets you a first date, if you do something weird you can ensure that there is never a second date.
How Many Exes?

One of the biggest mistakes women do on a first date is talk about an ex. I have seen the entire spectrum of women who do this and it’s NEVER a good idea. I have been on dates where women talk about how their last boyfriend was abusive and now he’s in jail, how they have had sex with over 100 men and the last one was just a few hours ago, how they are still in love with their ex, how a certain ex was the best lover ever, how her last boyfriend was the one but just didn’t realize he should marry her. I could go on and on. I have seen it dozens of times and every time I without exception I think about how inappropriate it is.

Even if I tell a woman that it’s not ok to talk about her exes, usually she won’t stop. Because she has made it a part of her character.

I can usually tell a lot about someone based on the stories they tell in conversation. Younger women often only have stories about their parents or siblings. A little later in life, women have stories about their friends. Before long, some only have stories about their exes.

If a woman only has stories about her exes this tells me several things about her. She is perpetually in relationships and that is a big red flag for me. I want to be with a woman who is complete on her own, as Travis teaches about in GirlGetsRing. I also know that a girl ditches her friends as soon as she’s in a relationship, otherwise she would be telling stories about them.

When I hear about a woman’s exes I start to compare myself to them and I don’t like that. I only talk about my exes in my books and blog posts, I never talk about them on dates. I don’t want to make a woman I’m with uncomfortable and you shouldn’t do it to a man. You might be thinking right now that there is an exception to the rule, but there really isn’t. Talking about your exes is always awful on a first date.
Do You Want to Get Married?

I talk extensively in GirlGetsRing about my one blind date. My dad set me up with a girl who was just awful. One of the many mistakes she made was asking questions that let me know she was clearly husband shopping.

Let me be clear: I want you to marry me because you think I’m amazing, not because you want to be married!

Husband auditions remove every single piece of specialness from a relationship. Why would you ever want to do that? It’s ok to screen a man and see if he’s good husband material, but don’t be OBVIOUS about it.

Do not ask a man if he wants to get married, if he wants to have children, where he sees himself in five years, etc.

All these questions are big red flags. I’ve actually recently decided that I’m finally old enough to consider settling down — but these questions still freak me out.
The Interview

I’m a savvy conversationalist. I have written several books on dating and communication, given numerous lectures and personally trained hundreds of men on ways to improve their conversational and dating skills…and yet I still go on boring dates.

Some women will do whatever it takes to be on a boring date.

Here is a secret about women: you will ask boring questions and then get upset with a man for giving boring answers. This is a huge problem in online dating that I discuss in The Perfect Profile – women make boring profiles and then can’t figure out why they are getting boring emails.

On a date you don’t want to ask questions. Normal conversation is a flow of statements. When you are talking to your friends, it is almost always a group of people taking turns telling stories. The only time we get asked questions is at job interviews and on bad dates.

I know that sometimes you are both nervous and can’t make the conversation flow. So it is ok to ask questions – they just have to be open ended. Don’t ask him where he works. How much money he makes. Does he have any brothers and sisters. What’s his favorite color. How was the commute to work.

You want to ask interesting questions:

What’s your best friend like?

Would you rather be able to fly or breathe underwater? Why?

If you could go anywhere in the world where would you go?

What makes you happy?

I know these are deeper questions, but there is nothing worse than being boring. It’s the ultimate curse on a woman and it’s just as bad as being called desperate.

If you can avoid these three mistakes your dates will start going a lot better. And that will make life so much easier.

For more information please click here

Why First Kisses Go Bad

If you have ever been on a first date, you have probably had an awful kiss moment. This is one of the most important things I have to teach men about because it’s mostly our fault. But the truth is that women never really help us.

If a man takes you on a date there is a 90% chance he wants to kiss you. He is only waiting and really just paying his taxes until you give him the sign that he has: spent enough money, told enough good stories, spent enough time with you.

What you need to know is that men cannot read your signals.

I know that it’s hard to believe but all of those subtle little signals you are sending out are only understandable to other women. I have stood next to a student while a woman kept leaning in closer and closer to his mouth and he didn’t realize what was happening. She would close her eyes, tilt her head and lean in toward his mouth. He wouldn’t react and she would rock back out. I had to sneak up behind him and tell him that I would punch him in the kidney if he didn’t kiss her.

That might seem extreme but it was the only way that woman was ever going to get kissed.

The worst thing that can happen on a first date is the awkward front door moment. I spend so much time teaching my male students how to avoid it, but it always amazes me how many women will actively create this socially awkward moment.
The earlier you kiss on a date the better.

Please have the courtesy to remove the elephant in the room.

He is only pretending to listen to your story about your sister’s new job. All he’s thinking about is that moment. Is she going to kiss me? Is she not going to kiss me? Am I wasting my time?

If you ever wonder why men don’t remember anything you say on a first date, that’s why. It’s a constant track running through the backs of their minds.

Is there a solution?

Of course there is! I wouldn’t leave you hanging. I am going to teach you a kissing technique that has been passed down from male dating coach to male dating coach for generations. This is the first kissing move I ever tried, and it worked great.

Just say to him, “Do you want to kiss me?”

Now I know that sounds scary, but don’t worry. There is an escape hatch. Besides, don’t you want to know early on if you are with a guy who’s not interested?

There are only three possible answers: yes, no and maybe.

YES – “Then what are you waiting for?” and kiss.

NO – “Oh, you just looked like you were thinking about something.”

MAYBE, “Let’s find out,” and the ball is in his court.

By moving the kiss forward in the date you avoid creating an awkward situation that actually makes you no longer attracted to a man. If you have that front door moment, there is just too much pressure. It forces you to recall way too many movies and that’s something you really want to avoid.

So just get it out of the way so you can have a nice date.

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Have you heard the inspirational quote that goes something like this, “Our character is what we do when we think no one is looking”?

Nugget: Have you heard the inspirational quote that goes something like this, “Our character is what we do when we think no one is looking”? Yeah, well… that wisdom can be applied to relationships as well. You can get a good indication of the character of a potential girlfriend/boyfriend by just observing what they do and how they treat others when it “doesn’t matter.”

What it Means: You can tell a lot about a person’s character by watching how they interact with others. People are able to put on a “front” or a “façade” for a short amount of time (especially on date, etc.), but they will always revert back to their true character. This is a scary thought when it’s applied to relationships. Can you imagine getting engaged to a man who has been a “different person” throughout your entire courtship and suddenly becomes this irate, hot head with no regard for others? Talk about a nightmare…
This type of scenario happens all to often in relationships because people feel that they can revert back to “themselves” when no one is watching (except you) and/or there are no consequences for their misbehavior.

To avoid being fooled by someone’s “front” in a relationship, look at how they interact and treat people when it doesn’t matter. For example, your boyfriend runs into the grocery store and lets you wait in the car. As he gets all the way through the parking lot (and assumes he is out of your site), he passes an elderly lady loading her groceries into her car. She suddenly drops a bag and her oranges roll everywhere. Does he just look at her and keep walking or does he stop to help?

Bottom Line: Walking past a lady that dropped her oranges doesn’t make you a bad person or someone who can’t have a solid relationship. On the other hand, honing in on someone’s actions when no one is looking is a good indicator of their true character.

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Using an ultimatum to get that sought after wedding ring is like committing relationship suicide.

Using an ultimatum to get that sought after wedding ring is like committing relationship suicide. If you feel the need to present your boyfriend with an ultimatum concerning your relationship, it MUST be authentic!

What it means: When it comes to women who so badly want to be engaged to their boyfriend, ultimatums are a commonplace. The waiting game drives desperation (especially if she has been waiting for more than a year or two to get engaged) and desperation can lead to threats!

Yes, ultimatum is just a fancy word for “threat”. Women who throw marriage ultimatums at their boyfriends obviously don’t realize that this kind of pressure and “all or nothing” attitude commonly results in the demise of the relationship.

When is an ultimatum acceptable? Only when you are ready to deal with the truth and act on the response! If you give your boyfriend a “now or never” lecture, you best be prepared to pack your bags and leave if he comes back with a “never” response. Staying in a relationship after he says “never” will only result in your losing all credibility and leverage in the relationship.

Bottom Line: Only give an ultimatum if you’re ready to hear the truth and are willing to act on it, whatever the response may be.

NOTE: You can link to the GGR video using the angle of “Here’s a much better way to get him to pop the question WITHOUT using threats and dangerous ultimatums.”

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